Positive Psychology Books on Relationships

The first thing to note is that many of the books in other categories either have sections on relationships, or deal with topics that improve relationships. Specifically, under books on leadership, see Jane Dutton's Energize Your Workplace. In general, however, if you become more optimistic, more resilient, happier, and learn to use your strengths and see strengths in others, your relationships are also quite likely to improve! This is true not only on the personal level, but in the world of work also. For example, shortly after I began giving CLE programs based on positive psychology in the fall of 2006, I was advertising for an Associate Director at the Commission where I work. I got an email from an applicant that read, in part, I attended your CLE program, “Lawyering and the Good Life,” and came away thinking that if I ever had the chance to work with you, I’d have to go for it. So, when I saw the AD announcement, I had to take the chance.” In any event, here are some positive psychology books that focus specifically on relationships:

	Dr. Gottman is the pre-emininent researcher on relationships, especially marriage. This is his presentation of his research applied to a broader array of relationships. Interestingly, the 5:1 positve to negative ratio for excellence discovered by Losada in relation to business teams also shows up here.
	Tom Rath, a MAPP classmate, describes Gallup’s discoveries concerning the various roles friends can fulfill and how to use this information to be a better friend and to strengthen the web of friendships around you. He looks at the importance of both quantity (at least three!) and quality of friendships in various domains of life. A key insight is that not all friends are friends in the same way. Some are builders, other chanpions, collaborators, companions, connectors, energizers, mind openers, or navigators. Not expecting everything out of any one friend helps! As with other Gallup books, Tom describes the research behind their conclusions in appendici
	If the link to this book goes bad, someone let me know, ok? Amazon had two versions, one at $6.29 and one at $10.19. I linked to the less expensive version, but that may be a short-time offer. Even at $10.19, it's a barain! When this book was assigned for MAPP, I thought, "Yuck! Who wants to read about aging?" Then I read it and found it inspiring and uplifting, which is kind of odd for a book that reports on multiple, long-term longitudinal studies that Dr. Vaillant took over and has shepherded for decades. He's drawn insights, backed by statistics, from these studies as to what contributes to a long, happy life. George Vaillant may be more poet than scientist (and he's quite a scientist!), and that comes through in this book. I list it here because it emphasizes the importance of relationships, but, if you are reaching that point in life where the possibility you might some day be old is becoming real, I highly recommend this book. It may well help you make the years ahead some of the best of your life!

Comments

[Greg Cynamon]

This book surely an interesting read - wish to have this one..